Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Call the police on me...

Let me introduce you to a daily ritual... THE WALKING OF THE DOGS!

A little background first. 25+lbs white chow mix "Little M", 45 lbs black Akita,shepherd,pit bull mix "Ms S", and her sister 45 lbs black & white shepherd,border collie mix "Ms Dog" (not their real names changed to protect the innocent) a 15 foot retractable leash and 2 6 foot leashes all held together by two carabiners. About 7:15 -7:45am the race is on down the stairs flies 3 dogs all racing towards the door. Little M is always very good about the leash part, Ms S and Ms Dog can be touchy about the leashes and a minute or so of calling them and using all the important dog words to cokes them back down the stairs (you know the ones park, walk, outside). Ok everyone is locked in and then a race out the door. Little M usually stops at the front lawn and then we move to the park. 15-20 minutes of a nice stroll gets everyone to do what they need to until later. Usually uneventful although I have been known to find things like stolen purses, bird feathers, and my own lost glasses.

So this morning I was just puttering about trying to encourage the dog business not really paying attention when I look over to see some guy trying to drive into the park. I guess he didn't see the sign "No Motorized Vehicles Beyond This Point." So I don't move knowing this is a walking path and I will be damned if I am going to let someone drive through. He rolls down his window and tells me to get out of the road. I tell him this is a walking path not a road and vehicles are not permitted in the park and alerted him to the sign he just drove past. He proceeded to tell me that he knows the sign and that he lives near the park so that it is OK for him to use the park as his personal turn around. I stood my ground trying to get him to back up and turn around on the street like a normal person. He kept telling me to move and I kept telling him about the sign. He finally told me if I had a problem with his driving to call the police on him and turned around on the grass.

WAIT A SECOND.... CALL THE POLICE? I guess he hasn't heard about my reputation yet... heck my wife jokes that I have a direct line to them I call them so much, she loves to tell the story how I called the police on old ladies cause they were blocking my driveway. I am a one man neighborhood watch so yes I do call the police. His statement wasn't calling my bluff that statement was challenging me to go ahead and do it. You better watch it Mr. I have chased down a drug dealer, busted a guy setting up a field day finish line, and shut down an illegal yard sale. I don't take kindly to people not respecting their surroundings.

Sadly I had more important things to do when I go back to the house this morning so I choose not to call the police today. I have chosen to do the next best thing I am immortalizing his jerky behavior for the whole world to see.

Yes that's right the whole world now knows what a jerk you are, and me I now have your plate number so next time you use the park as your personal turn around the police will get called. You have been warned and your behavior will not be tolerated in Ms S's park.

UPDATE: SUMMER 2007 Things have changed in the park and I no longer feel the need for public shaming. The names of this person was removed because this crank's heart grew three times that day.

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